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Question : I have been dating a girl since last 3 years but my girlfriend left me recently for a smart boy. I am a fat and a  dark complexioned boy who is also a chain smoker. I feel very low and hate myself a lot. Please help.

Dear Teentalker,

Thanks for writing to us. I can really understand how bad you are feeling these days.

Our self esteem is how we percieve and value ourselves. Having a little self beilief will hamper you to live your life fully. You need to work upon this before  further creates an another mental health issue.  To deal with this:

1. Avoid negative self talks: Like constantly thinking you are a fat and a dark complexioned or an unsmart boy, replace these thoughts by I am a good and nice boy.

2. Connect with your loved ones: Surround yourself with those who loves you genuinely, do meet with your good friends, share your issues with your family if you can, you will feel good.

3. Learn to be assertive: When you don’t like yourself, it’s easy to assume others won’t like youeither. You may find you go out of your way to help others as you feel it’s the only way they’ll like you. Instead of that learn to say, set your limits if caring and helping others.

4. Set yourself a challenge: Find something you like doing and do more of it. You could take up a hobby, join a class or volunteer your time for something you feel passionate about. Making small goals such as trying a recipe or learning the days of the week in a new language can help you to feel more positive about yourself.

Hope this helps, if you have any other query, do connect online for chat between 11am-8pm or drop us an offline message.

Regards,

Expert Teentalk India