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Question : I have to wear spectacles. I try wearing lenses but that just takes too much time. I’m short and have now started growth hormone therapy. I feel no one talks to me because of the way I look and I feel left out. I feel because of this I can’t part take in outdoor sport activities, which I love. Teentalker , 13-year-old

Dear Teentalker,

When I read your question I immediately identified with my 13-year-old self who was so conscious about wearing spectacles and felt left out. Adolescence can be such a painful time and mine was no exception. I want you to know something. You are beautiful with or without spectacles..

 Here are a few active ways to deal with this:

  • Dig in a little deeper and harder and list all your abilities, interests, knowledge, strengths that you possess.
  • Developing communication skills and initiating a conversation with classmates will help you build your confidence.

Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up and feel sorry for ourselves. So I want you to pick yourself up and think, is there absolutely no one who likes talking to me or is it my own assumption? I’d also like you to start thinking of other positive traits, which you have tucked away.

Do you know the world’s greatest footballer Lionel Messi too struggled with his height and was on Growth Hormone Therapy when he was younger, but that did not deter him from being the best that he could be.  Had he said, “no I’m not going to play anymore”, imagine what the world would be missing! Thinking you are left out is self-defeating – it’s likely that you are shutting yourself from everyone and limiting your potential.

Practice wearing lenses which can be more convenient and more durable as it helps you ease out especially when you are fond of playing sports like basketball or football and give you complete vision as it enhances the peripheral vision. Meet an optometrist and tell them to teach you, but before that try and calm yourself, as the more anxious you are the longer it takes to get those lenses in.

You too can develop a positive self esteem and confidence by;

  • Focusing on your unique traits and features
  • Try making conversation with other students when you cross each other or in your break.
  • Experiment a little! Get trendy spectacles which suit your face shape and one you can wear glasses on some days and contact lenses on others.
  • Join a sport activity you enjoy
  • Treat your body and mind with respect. Exercise your mind with relaxation techniques and your body by going for a run. Keeping fit will keep you confident

The one person who has to like you is YOU and the rest will follow. Respecting how you think and feel has a huge impact on how you behave. Negative thoughts about the way you look will fuel an unhealthy and low self-esteem. Respecting every part of you is key in gaining confidence, inside out. As you begin to improve your body image, you will start the journey of self-acceptance, which will help build your confidence.

It takes a conscious effort and commitment to self to experience that positive change.If you’re feeling discouraged most of the time, and can’t seem to find ways to feel better about yourself, it’s important to contact a counsellor or a trusted teacher.

Hope this helps, if you have any other query do connect online for chat between 11am-8pm or drop us an offline message. 

Regards,

Expert Teentalk India