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Question : I have never actually had a long conversation with a girl, let alone date any. Needless to say, I’m a virgin, and paid sex is just too risky for me. I have been very shy about sexuality since early days and have never really opened up to anyone about it. The real problem is that because I keep my sexual frustration so bottled up in real life, I have to resort to excessive masturbation to release myself. I don’t know how to break out of this cycle of porn, excessive self-abuse and then guilt. Please help me. Teentalker

Dear Teentalker,

Thanks for writing to us. I can really understand your frustration and the mental pressure you are having. You can come out of the vicious cycle that you have got into. You are still young and it is never too late to make friends.

 It is very important that you set some goals for yourself. Challenge yourself for a week and you will get rid of guilt and feel a bit better. Try healing your body, work on yourself on how you look, dress up well, smile at others in College, give attention to females. If this does not work for you in short term it will surely in long term.

In my opinion mastrubation is not a bad thing. Its a way for self pleasuring satisfying your sexual urges. But the real problem is the compulsion.Since this problem didnt increased in one day then it wont go away in one day. You can gradually work on it and decrease the frequency of matrubation. Masturbate only when you feel a strong urge.

Try to distract you brain. Engage in some hobbies. it will consume your useful energy in some constructive work.this will redirect your energy. Make some good friends. Share some good time with them. Meditate and do deep breathing excercises, it will keep you calm.

Hope this helps, should you have any other query, do connect online for chat between 11am-8pm or drop us an offline message.

Regards,

Expert teentalk India