Many students think that they need help with an emotional or mental health issue, but don’t share it with their parents because they don’t know how to express themselves and how the parents will react.
Depression is a serious mental health problem that can hamper our life if left untreated. We feel sad and hopeless sometimes in our life, but that is not always depression. A proper medical diagnosis of depression is very important for the right treatment.
Feelings you may have when you are depressed
The feelings of depression can stay for months and years. These feelings can start to interfere in your daily life. They can cause problems in your studies, career or relationships.
These feelings can be like –
- Not interested in the things that you were earlier interested in.
- Finding it hard to concentrate or focus on things.
- Start to feel hopeless and worthless.
- Not able to sleep at all or oversleeping.
- Getting difficult to get out of bed.
- Not wanting to eat or overeating.
- Experiencing pains and aches in the body.
Things to keep in mind before talking to parents
It may seem hard to talk to parents about your issues especially when you do not share everything with them. It is also difficult to share because sometimes you are unclear about what is happening with you and do not know how to explain. But the fact that you should understand is your parents are more experienced than you and they care about you. Whatever you share they may take time to understand it and react to it. You also have to consider that for them “Depression” is negative or new. You may also be surprised that they may give you a different perspective to your problems which can clear your confusion.
Sometimes people worry about how parents will react like,“what will mom say, “what if father doesn’t understand, “what if they misunderstand me or scold me.”All these thoughts must be coming to your mind before starting a conversation. But the thing is whatever they do, they care for you and they only want the best for you.
How to start
You may be waiting for your parents to start a conversation, but sometimes you have to take the charge. Try to find the perfect time when they are in a good and calm mood. Ask them whenever they have time or you can ask them, “Can you talk to me for some time? I have not felt good for a couple of days and need to talk to someone.”
If it is too hard for you to talk about it, you can write it down on a paper and give it to them.
Sometimes your action speaks for you. For example- when you are sad or crying or overwhelmed, you just tell things in a flow and that is how a conversation can start. At that time you just have to calm yourself a little bit so that you can tell your parents about how you are feeling.
How to explain what is going on with you
Before you start a conversation, it may prove better for you to just talk it out in your mind, which may make you feel relieved. But in some cases it can be difficult as you are not able to put your feelings in words. At that time it will be better to tell your parents that,“I am not feeling good for a few days. There are many things that are going on in my head but I need some time to process these thoughts and tell you about my feelings.” Try to talk to them afterwards when you are ready. Remember that your parents will be concerned and they may frequently ask you how you are doing. Do not take this as nagging as they ask you out of love and concern.
Your problem may not be solved after talking to them but surely you will feel lighter after sharing your problems with someone and when you know that there are people who are always there for your support. It will give you the strength to fight this situation.
When and how to consult a psychologist/counselor
If you are going through this phase for a longer period of time and this is affecting your life, then you should see a counselor or psychologist or psychiatrist. After this conversation is over, keep talking to your parents about how it is affecting your concentration and focus on everything. Some parents are a little hesitant to go to a psychiatrist or psychologist but you need to make them understand in a calm manner that why you think you need to see a professional.
If your parents can find one then it is great. If not then you can always take help from other doctors or check online for the psychologists practicing in your city.
What if talking to your parents does not help
Sometimes parents have their own struggles and you may not get the help that you expect. Some parents may ignore this or they might be taking it lightly. Then you need to open up to another adult like other relative of yours who you think will understand. You can also reach out to your school counselor or teachers. Just remember that you should not stop until you receive any help because your mental health is equally important.
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