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Do's and Don'ts of a new romance

Taking things to the next level might be complicated in the beginning. Here are a few do's and don'ts for the same.

Anyone who has had a relationship or more knows how tricky new relationship can be. Firstly you are a little nervous, there are plenty of butterflies in your stomach and if you have had a relationship in the past, you are scared too. In such a mix of emotions, it becomes but natural to behave in an unexpected and unwelcoming way.

So, if you have started a new relationship, here are a few do’s and don’ts that will help you survive the first crucial weeks of your relationship.

Do: Make plans in advance

There’s nothing worse than getting a text at 6 PM saying “movie tonight?” Make a plan a day or two before so that your partner knows you’re actually prioritizing the date.

Don’t: Talk about your ex constantly

Whether it’s an overabundance of compliments or an onslaught of insults, talking about an ex all the time is really irritating. Don’t be silent on the subject completely; just don’t bring it up every now and then.

Do: Make an effort with their friends

You may feel like not wanting to leave your new beau’s side for several months. But to keep things going, you’ll need to get out there and woo his/her friends too. Once they see you bonding with their friends, they would want to keep you around.

Don’t: Get too attached

Yes, you read it right, this is the modern age after all. Love comes and goes and before you know it, you’re back on Tinder. Not to be a pessimist, but it's better not to get overly attached for the initial period.

Do: Take a break from Tinder

You will have to stop going on random first dates or flirting over texts with a stranger if you’re actually starting something real. So say no to Tinder for a while.

Don’t: Send messages constantly

You might be excited to share every minute detail of your life with your new beau, but the reality is they need some time too. Wait for a few days until you find out whether they are interested in hearing everything about your day or not.

Do: Foot the bill

This goes for both the genders. Divide your bills for dates and hangouts in advance. Sure, after a few months you can go dutch on everything, but it’s fun to make that special someone feel pampered by giving them a treat.

Don’t: Play it too cool

If you’re lucky enough to find someone with whom you do enjoy spending your time with, let them know. If you like them, be bold and tell them? Honesty goes a long way in helping to move you from early dating to real relationship territory.

If you have a story to share, Email it to us HERE.

If you have a query, Email it to us HERE.

You can also chat with the counsellor by clicking on Teentalk Expert Chat.

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Keeping your friendships strong

“Friends are the family we choose for ourselves” - Edna Buchanon

Friends are an incredibly important part of our lives. Our friends and friendships define us. And that's why a good friendship is indeed something to savor and protect. Yet, like any human relationship, even the closest of friendships can unravel in moments of weakness. How can you avoid a falling out with someone you’ve long trusted and cared about? Here are a few tips:

Choose your friends wisely

Remember that you do not have to be everyone’s friend. Choose to be friends with people who build you up, not tear you down, who welcome you and not alienate and insult you.

Listen closely

Be an attentive listener to what the other person is saying. Let that person know that you not only hear them but understand as well.

Respond carefully

As the wise say, think before you speak – especially when you are angry. Sometimes, taking a moment to think about what you say before you start blurting things out will spare hurt feelings and bruised pride.

Avoid consistent advice or trying to fix all of your friend’s problems

When a friend asks for your advice, give it. However, don’t wiggle your way into every aspect of your friend’s life, telling them how to be the star of their own show. Give them their deserved space.

Be the kind of friend you want others to be for you

You want friends who are honest, kind, compassionate, fair, not judgmental, authentic, and intelligent.  Be that person first and you’ll be more likely to attract that kind of friend into your life.

Apologize when needed

When you do something wrong, admit it.  Learn to apologize. Sometimes a friend is upset, and all they want from you is to (genuinely) say “sorry.”

Keep your promises

If you know you can’t deliver something, don’t promise that you will. If you make a promise, do your best to keep it.

Celebrate what you have in common

Most friendships are started because of some common thread – a favourite sport, a love of books, an appreciation of fine dining, an insufferable boss, etc. Cherish your common interests together and your bond will grow stronger.

Try new things together

What new experiences can you share with your friend? It could be as simple as checking out the new local coffee shop, or as adventurous as bungee jumping.

Keep personal information confidential

When a friend tells you a secret it is because they trust you and believe that you will keep what they told you in the strictest of confidence.  Do not betray your friend by sharing their secrets with others. Many times relationships are ruined over spilled secrets.

More importantly, be authentic, be yourself and be honest. Avoid putting up a fake personality. We all test our relationships by throwing something out there about our true nature. We then hide behind a corner, head peeking out, waiting for the response.  If someone can’t accept you for who you are, developing a relationship with them will be hard. Don’t change yourself by denying your beliefs, values, and point of view, for the sake of fitting in. You won’t be doing anyone any favors.

 

If you have a story to share, Email it to us HERE.

If you have a query, Email it to us HERE.

You can also chat with the counsellor by clicking on Teentalk Expert Chat.

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