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A super simple 5 step guide to dealing with sibling squabbles

Most siblings share a love-hate relationship, here is how you can learn to get along peacefully...

Can’t live with them, can’t live without them, right?! Siblings are friends who are family, and while that makes them twice as special, it also makes the relationship twice as complicated.

Let’s face it, sibling squabbles are inevitable and there is no running away from them both – siblings and squabbles. There are however ways to try and get along better and learn to share and care.

Let’s try and give an honest shot to loving the adopted one (ref the classic sibling joke)...

Family Meetings

They are important you know. The family meetings where you and your sibling get to make your case and your parents take charge of the situation. Theseare the times when you all can get together and giggle away the tension.

Even if things get serious, you will learn to face tough situations like one unit which is a good bonding exercise. So huddle together and talk it out.

Sibling’s day out

Spending quality time together works wonders for any relationship. A weekend getaway or a day out with your sibling without your parents will give you two the time to share and bond.

This alone time minus mommy, daddy will also allow you two to shed your guards down and bond in ways you couldn’t with parents round! Maybe even share a secret or two.

According to our in-house Counsellor, Kshitija Sawant, “Adolescence is a phase where you not only discover yourself, but by bonding with your siblings, you also learn to respect and accept them despite the individual differences.”

Playful pillow fights

Pillow fights are a good stress buster. Get your feelings out, go ahead and swing that pillow. You two could even gang up on the parents, and have fun working as a team.  

Family Games

Conversations and laughter diffuse tension and if you can team that with good food then you have a perfect family evening.

Try teaming up with your sibling so you two can brush up on your co-existing and co-winning skills.

Maintain healthy competition

Winning and losing are a part of life but competing with each other is not as much fun as winning together is. The sooner you learn to work together and not against each other the better.

Maintaining healthy competition however, can keep you both inspired and going.

All in good spirit ?

If you are having a tough time dealing with your sibling, you can reach out for help. Leave a comment below or get in touch with the counselor at expert@teentalkindia.com

  

If you have a story to share, Email it to us HERE.

If you have a query, Email it to us HERE.

You can also chat with the counsellor by clicking on Teentalk Expert Chat.

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NEXT STORY


How parents can help their kids to reach academic goals

How parents respond to their kids makes a lot of difference, read how!

There is a natural anxiety for doing well in exams. Especially in class 10 and 12 when the results of those exams are going to determine your future and your career. There is bound to be pressure. In such a situation, Dr Maya Kirpalani says that, “telling doesn’t help. In fact when the teenager is told that there is pressure, it gets doubled.”

There is immense responsibility of the parents in such a situation. “Parents and the teenager need to sit and have a supportive dialogue.” Some of the questions that can be asked are:

  • Are you anxious?
  • What do you think the worst thing that can happen?

After opening the floor to a dialogue and gauging response, emphathise with the teenager.

Facing the fear

Oftentimes, when teenagers are not able to fulfil expectations, they tend to self-blame. “This is called a ruminative thought pattern where they keep repeating beliefs such as “I am a failure” to themselves on loop.” The key to breaking this pattern is to inject a new thought-process that says that, “By re-inforcing that you are not a failure and this is a feeling with help,” says Kirpalani. Also not letting them get weighed down by their feelings will help, she adds.

Many things can bother teenagers such as:

  • I am not as good as my friend
  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of not reaching the goal

Parents attitude matters

Teenagers need to be heard and listened to but sometimes parents are over anxious and expect a lot from their kids. Some points to keep in mind:

  • Comparison might dishearten the teenager
  • Injecting values such as perseverance will help
  • Family environment matters. If there are fights, the teenager might get distracted
  • Families need to talk to their teens about their dreams, fears, aspirations in addition to their academic goals
  • Teaching kids gratitude and discipline

If you have a story to share, Email it to us HERE.

If you have a query, Email it to us HERE.

You can also chat with the counsellor by clicking on Teentalk Expert Chat.

Comments

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Disclaimer: TeentalkIndia does not offer emergency services and is not a crisis intervention centre, if you or someone you know is experiencing acute distress or is suicidal/self harming, please contact the nearest hospital or emergency/crisis management services or helplines.