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7 Ways to Bounce Back From Failure

Success cannot be achieved without failure. Yes, failure hurts. But there are ways to bounce back from failure.

We fail, we make mistakes, we get hurt but with all this, we learn too. Yes, when we fail or when we make bad choices, we feel terrible, frustrated and at times, demotivated. But we can’t really avoid it. 

As much as our society embarrasses us about failures, the truth is, without failure, we cannot achieve anything.

Only after we’ve succeeded, we look back upon the hardships we experienced, the pain we experienced during our failures, but we’ve learnt from them and we’ll be prepared to not let that happen again.

Whatever I’m saying here is surely easier to say than actually experience it, but the fact of life is that no matter how many failures you experience, people only care about the successes, how you’ve overcome them my bouncing back and stayed confident throughout the ordeal.

Our mind only sees what we want it to see. If we only fixate on problems in front of us with the fear of failure, we won’t really be able to find a solution for it. 

It will fixate on the problem and failure, making us lose our confidence and self-esteem. However, when we flip our way of seeing the failure as something negative and start to see them as stepping stones to reach our goal, our mind will only see positivity and start functioning towards our growth.

As said by J.K.Rowling, “Some failure in life is inevitable. It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all—in which case, you fail by default.”

Here are a few ways which will help you bounce back from failure and continue to follow your goal with the same spirit – 

 

  • Accept  the failure

Let’s be honest here. Experiencing failure sucks. When you face failure, it takes a major hit on our self-confidence. Sometimes it’s due to something you did wrong, sometimes things just don’t end up in your favour no matter how hard you try. However, accepting failure is very important. Acceptance will help you to see the damage and prepare you to avoid such a situation in the future. 

 

  • Practice grounding techniques

Grounding techniques help you to calm yourself when you’re overwhelmed with things going out of control in front of you. Simply take a deep breath for four seconds, hold the breath for four seconds and exhale for four seconds. Grounding techniques will help you maintain your calm and think appropriately without anxiety and fear clouding your judgement. 

 

  • Try to analyze the reason

Look for the reason what led to this failure. The reason could be something you didn’t anticipate. Analyze the situation, try to separate the trouble-causing elements away for a successful outcome in the next try. 

 

  • Forgive yourself

Everyone makes mistakes, you’re only human. Regardless of how grave or silly the reason was for the failure, don’t give yourself a hard time. Only you can love yourself like no one else ever can. 

 

  • Take efforts to heal your injuries

Sometimes the failures can cause scars -- either mental or physical. In such a situation, give yourself time to heal. In case something you’re working on is affecting you a lot mentally, take a break. that will not only make you feel more positive, but it will also result in a better outcome. 

 

  • Use positive affirmations

The only way you can feel positive is if you’re surrounded by positivity. Keep your space surrounded with posters with inspiring quotes, sayings by successful personalities, that can help spark positivity in you and help you feel optimistic. 

 

  • Show gratitude

When failure surrounds you, it can cloud the vision and force us to only see the negatives. However, in such situations, try looking for positives, and be thankful for them for they will help your motivation get the strength it needs to move forward. Express gratitude for those positives.

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How to Talk To Parents About Depression

Many teens think that they need help with an emotional or mental health issue, but don't share it with their parents because they don't know how to express themselves and how parents will react to this.
Snigdha Teentalkindia Counsellor

Depression is a serious mental health problem that can destroy our life if left untreated. We feel sad and hopeless sometimes in our life, but that is not always depression. A proper medical diagnosis of depression is very important for the right treatment.

Feelings you may have when you are depressed

The feelings of depression can stay for months and years. These feelings can start to interfere in your daily life. They can cause problems in your studies, career or relationships.

These feelings can be like - 

  • Not interested in the things that you were earlier interested in.
  • Finding it hard to concentrate or focus on things.
  • Start to feel hopeless and worthless.
  • Not able to sleep at all or oversleeping.
  • Getting difficult to get out of bed.
  • Not wanting to eat or overeating.
  • Experiencing pains and aches in the body.

Things to keep in mind before talking to parents

It may seem hard to talk to parents about your issues especially when you do not share everything with them. It is also difficult to share because sometimes you are unclear about what is happening with you and do not know how to explain it. But the fact that you should consider before sharing it with your parents is they are more experienced than you and they care about you. Whatever you share they may take time to understand it or react to it. You also have to consider that for them this term "Depression" is negative or new. You can be also surprised to see that they may give you a different perspective to your problems which can clear your confusion.

Sometimes people worry about how parents will react like,“what will mom say, “what if father doesn't understand, “what if they misunderstand me or scold me.”All these thoughts must be coming to your mind before starting a conversation. But the thing is whatever they do, they care for you and they only want the best for you.

How to start

You may be waiting for your parents to start a conversation, but sometimes you have to take the charge. Try to find the perfect time when they are in a good and calm mood. Ask them whenever they have time or you can ask them, “Can you talk to me for some time? I have not felt good for a couple of days and need to talk to someone.”

If it is too hard for you to talk about it, you can write it down on a paper and give it to them.

Sometimes your action speaks for you. For example- when you are sad or crying or overwhelmed, you just tell things in a flow and that is how a conversation can start. At that time you just have to calm yourself a little bit so that you can tell your parents about how you are feeling.

How to explain what is going on with you

Before you start a conversation, it may prove better for you to just talk it out in your mind, which may make you feel relieved. But in some cases it can be difficult as you are not able to put your feelings in words. At that time it will be better to tell your parents that,“I am not feeling good for a few days. There are many things that are going on in my head but I need some time to process these thoughts and tell you about my feelings.” Try to talk to them afterwards when you are ready. Remember that your parents will be concerned and they may frequently ask you how you are doing. Do not take this as nagging as they ask you out of love and concern.

Your problem may not be solved after talking to them but surely you will feel lighter after sharing your problems with someone and when you know that there are people who are always there for your support. It will give you the strength to fight this situation.

When and how to consult a psychologist/counselor

If you are going through this phase for a longer period of time and this is affecting your life, then you should see a counselor or psychologist or psychiatrist. After this conversation is over, keep talking to your parents about how it is affecting your concentration and focus on everything. Some parents are a little hesitant to go to a psychiatrist or psychologist but you need to make them understand in a calm manner that why you think you need to see a professional.

If your parents can find one then it is great. If not then you can always take help from other doctors or check online for the psychologists practicing in your city. You can check our website or consult us if you need any reference for seeing psychologists in your city.

What if talking to your parents does not help

Sometimes parents have their own struggles and you may not get the help that you expected. Some parents may ignore this or they might be taking it lightly. Then you need to open up to another adult like any other relative of yours who you think will understand you. You can also reach out to your school counselor or teachers. Just remember that you should not stop until you receive any help because your mental health is as important as your physical health.

If you have a story to share,Click Here

If you have a query,Click Here.

You can also chat with the counsellor by clicking on Teentalk Expert Chat.

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